Just for Laugh - continue..

Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.
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A drunkard was brought to court. Just before the trial there was acommotion in the gallery. The judge pounded the gravel on his tableand shouted, "Order, order." The drunkard immediately responded,"Thank you, your honour, I'll have a scotch and soda."
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Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Penang intwo days time?
Post Master : Well it might do.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Johor.
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An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist.'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.''How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.'How long has what been going on?' said the man.
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Girl : Do you love me?
Boy : Yes Dear.
Girl : Would you die for me?
Boy : No, mine is undying love.
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1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.
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Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born.
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Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in thefield"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.
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Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu
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